I'm Like a Weeble!

We spent the weekend in Phoenix helping Monkey Man's cousin celebrate her 30th birthday. Her house is always a big hit with the 4 year old because she has a Wii. And really? What could be more wonderful to a preschooler already addicted to video games and obsessed with sports?

And she lets him drink Coke. It's kiddie heaven.

So she got the Wii Fit thingie for her birthday and much fun was had laughing at the adults who were often much worse at the activities than Quake. For those of you who haven't seen it in action, when you first get started it measures your "Wii age" based on some combination of your height, weight and balance ability on a quick succession of tests. Everyone else got ages 20 and 30 years above their real age. I managed to get a 37, only 1 year, actually 6 months, more than I currently am.

Losers! I may be fat, but I'm agile, damn it!

My mother will be so proud to know that all that money she spent on dance lessons finally paid off...

Did I Forget Something?

Today was parent-teacher conferences at Quake's new preschool. I admit that I was on my knees crying, "Why, God, Why?" when I found out that he wouldn't be going to school for two days, but then my babysitter called and said she had the week off too. See? God really does answer prayers.

Anyway, I left Quake at home. Yes, alone. He's already 4 for crying out loud. Oh right, I already mentioned the babysitter. Nevermind. But I took Cha Cha with me because Cha Cha? No so big on the whole being left with strangers thing. A category which includes his own father. To be fair, I sometimes like to pretend Monkey Man is a stranger too...

Was I in the middle of telling a story?

I'm listening to David Sedaris in the car (Books on CD from the library are my salvation. Amen.) so I'm snorting and wiping tears away when I pull up to the school. I manage to pull myself together by the time I get to Quake's classroom where I stop. Thinking. Something. Something. Something is missing...

Oh, right! The baby! Cha Cha was still snoozing peacefully when I got back to the car. And I'm officially a dumb-ass.

Stupid Baby Tricks

I discovered a new way to soothe a cranky baby last night.

Bacon.

Hoes Are Garden Tools...

Holy crapola! How did it get to be October?

Have you tried Pandora? It's this great internet radio site where you create your own station by telling the system which artists and songs you like. I've discovered that my musical tastes are just as schizoid as my choice in magazines. I've had to create a number of stations because it just can't seem to figure out any underlying theme to the songs I like. (note to Pandora developers: it's the lyrics, and yes, I know I'm strange)

The best part for me, because I'm admittedly not much of a music person (no one in my household owns an MP3 player or even sees the need for one), is getting to listen to really different music. Bust has great music reviews, and I've managed to find quite a few of the artists on the site. WooHoo, broadening my horizons!

So I'm enjoying some... sex-positive lyrics from Khia, when Monkey Man mentions that I might want to change the station. I turn down the volume to ask why (gonna give him a piece of my mind for not liking my new music) and realize that Quake is singing a line from the chorus. Pretty sure that language isn't acceptable at preschool...

Well I guess everyone is getting broadened horizons today!