How to Cure Morning Sickness

• Put saltines on bedside table to eat before getting out of bed. Wake up at 4am to the sound of your overweight cat eating the crackers for you. Curse cat; get out of bed to vomit.
• Eat an apple after the morning bile purge. Repeat on subsequent days as this seems to help. Vomit apple on subsequent days.
• Drink the usual morning cup of black tea. Vomit. Drink ginger tea. Vomit. Drink cinnamon tea. Vomit. Give up drinking anything hot. Mourn bitterly.
• Drink milk over ice despite having always hated milk. After a few days begin to vomit up the milk.
• Eat pickle after pickle. Eat at least one more pickle than you can safely keep down before realizing you've done so.
• Eat whatever you want. Decide to not care that you will vomit 20 minutes later.
• Contemplate spending $20/day for a drug that will stop the madness if your insurance refuses to pay for it.